Nostalgia: See the World with Different Eyes
By Cruzader
This afternoon, I got back home early after-work. I am so glad to know that I won’t get traffic jam on my way back. However, the feeling that I could have worked more haunted me still. The feeling is absurd because by now I still won’t get any extra payment for overtime work. My working time is 8 hours. And for that span of time only will my company compensate me.
Public Transportation did seems to run faster this afternoon at 4.30 pm. We don’t have to stop every two minutes because of mere jam. I sat down relax while listening to my favorite tune in Ipod. I take today, or to be specific this afternoon to evening time as my lucky day. I try to imagine what to do today. I don’t know yet. But I hope I will figure it out when I got back home.
I open my boarding room door. I open the curtain of my cupboard and exchange clothes. I stand and still wonder what to do next. But my eyes catch one golden spot in my room. My convenient bed. What a waste. If nobody slept there, then there is lack of capital utilization. I don’t think that’s a good idea. So I decided, yes I vote to take a nap now. For me it’s an easy decision. It’s like a personal agreement toward God, God, and Glory goals in 18th century. Why should we offend to those great ideas.
So I pursue my glory, and take an unexpectedly long nap, from 6.30 p.m. to 11.30 p.m. uninterrupted. I set my alarm at 07.45 already, but I think my ears obey my desire yet then my interest. Simply said. I fall into this very enjoyable indulgence.
I woke up and realized that my stomach is growling inside. I sat on my bed and it didn’t took too long until I decided to find dinner or supper as soon as possible. I need it good, fast and hot. So I got up and looking by the small “Kaki Lima” tents for interesting food choice. Somehow I bumped to Nasi Goreng tents; I think it would be just great. It met all of my criteria and it’s a safe choice since I know how it usually tastes like. Yummy.
Vacant time always gives you room to think over. If during work time, your brain is set to work for given goals. During vacant moments, when our brain needs to work, it search for topics we never think before. And that night, almost midnight, my brain has got my feeling very precisely.
It has been long time ago that I haven’t got the same feeling. Like nostalgia, I am here, waiting for fried rice in the Kaki Lima tent of pedestrian curb. It is so Jogja, and I missed it so much. The atmosphere, the cool air, a very relax body, etc surely it gives me very good feeling. However, more than that, what is misses is the feeling to control my own time. The feeling that I can stay up all night without worrying whether I will be tired when I worked the next day. The feeling that I have no burden to earn money to exist. That I am young. That what I should search for is nothing but my own desire and interest. That new opportunity will come closer to me instead for me to run after them. The Utopia of our own. The possibility that open eyes. The dream. The Courage and Hear that follow it. The heaven’s gate to eternal freedom.
My next question arises: Do I really need those freedoms. Will I be very happy when I stay vacant for long term? Two acid questions for any activities I consider is this:
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Will it turn me into better person?
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Will it please God in every way?
I think I know the answer: Not Really. Not Sure, but I guess no. Tonight I got my vacant time again to rethink my future. Thanks God. I still have my own time. I know now that I am in charge of whatever I thought and felt during the vacant time. I felt that I have a good time so far and I can be better if I get more focus on my work. I should pursue any dreams I want. I should be wise and consult the owner of wisdom each and every second of my life. I can get anything just everything if I dare to spread my wings and face the truths.